The monkey figures it out…


(This post is only for people 12 and over.)

A couple of days ago…

The Monkey: Admit it, Mommy. YOU are Santa Claus.

Her Mommy: OK. Fine.

The Monkey: Mommy! I can’t believe that you’ve been lying to me. *sad face*

Her Mommy: That is what all parents do.

The Monkey: I guess that means that there is no Easter Bunny or Tooth Fairy either.

Her Mommy: Sorry.

The Monkey: That makes sense. There was that one time…

Her Mommy: I know the one you mean.

The Monkey: I left my tooth under the pillow and it was still there the next day. No money.

Her Mommy: I just forgot.

The Monkey: It seemed weird.

Her Mommy: Sorry.

The Monkey: But, Mommy, you go to bed when I go to bed. How do you do it?

Her Mommy: I get back up in the middle of the night.

The Monkey: You do that for ME?

Her Mommy: Yes.

A few seconds pass.

The Monkey: Well, I guess I won’t be getting my laptop for Christmas if YOU are Santa.


17 Responses to “The monkey figures it out…”

  1. 1 Miriam

    Aw poor monkey. She had to find out sooner or later. And that’s hilarious that her mother actually forgot to be the tooth fairy.

  2. 2 MissE

    I couldn’t help but smile at that one.

    I was 4 when I found out about the Santa conspiracy… actually it was when my 6 and 8 year old cousins (both boys) decided it was time to educate me as to the truth. Apparently my screaming was what got the attention of our mothers and led to their being grounded for most of the Summer (Southern Hemisphere here) holidays.

    As for the Tooth Fairy – well, I ruined that one for my sister when I got upset that she had received more than 50c for her tooth, leading to the now infamous “Mum and Dad never gave me that much” comment that she still brings up today!

    Bad luck about the laptop, monkey.

  3. 3 jamelah

    I never really believed in Santa (skeptic from a very young age, I suppose), but this made me smile. The jump from “You do that for ME?” to “Well I guess I won’t be getting my laptop…” is pretty priceless.

  4. 4 sybil law

    One smart monkey!

  5. 5 Cait

    I think I found out really early too. My brother, being the typical older brother, decided that he wanted to ruin my life.

    I do, however, also remember that a childhood friend’s parents got REALLY into it one year. They told their son, Matt, to leave his camera downstairs in hopes of catch Santa. When he came to school with the developed prints, there were blurry red, white and green figures running across the room, what we decided to be elves.

    Turns out that his parents made elaborate models of elves, hooked them to wires, and took pictures of them going across the room.

  6. 6 molly

    That’s once smart cookie.

  7. 7 CamiKaos

    I think my daughter already knows at 5.

    She doesn’t get how Santa behaves so differently for so many people. Her answer, what she clings to, is that the Spirit of Santa is alive.

  8. 8 Michelle and the City

    awe. that’s always hard to find out when you’re a kid. like the big mean sister i am i told my little brother. he might have cried :(

  9. 9 each of the two

    i ruined it for my younger sister.

    i am so ashamed.

  10. 10 blogging

    omg. she is so precious.

    poor little thing. but she’s handling it like a trooper.

  11. 11 Hope

    Aw, love it!

  12. 12 Tia

    awww. poor monkey. that’s so cute.

    and funny. you know, in a crushing of the dreams variety.

  13. 13 distracted spunk

    My family’s Jewish. We don’t get a Santa. So no one ever ruined it for me. Tell Monkey about Chanukah – eight days of presents is enough to make any kid jealous. ;)

  14. 14 Ashley

    hahaha awwwww poor monkey! But she is one smart girl. Great convo.

  15. 15 libby

    hahaha smart kid.

    sad thing is? she’s probably right on with that guess.

  16. 16 Eve

    Hahahaha. I like the Monkey! She’s a smart cookie. I burst into tears when I asked my parents at age 7 and they told me the truth. I wanted them to lie, dammit!

  17. 17 sara

    It was birthday/Easter weekend of 1990. I was 5 turning 6 on Friday. I was talking about the Easter Bunny coming with my mom. The year before he had set up an ingenious scavenger hunt in our house and I was hoping he’d do it again so I mentioned it. My parents were busy with planning Easter dinner to host the fam and helping out my aunt and uncle who were expecting baby Kathleen (she did show up on Easter) so my mom said she didn’t know if “I’ll be able to do that again because it’s going to be a very busy weekend with dinner and Aunt Jan in the hospital.” Way to go mom.

    I then figured it out. Asked if she was also Santa and told her that I had an idea because usually boys don’t write like my mom.

    Then I quickly ran to spoil it all for my 3 year old brother. It didn’t sink in for him yet so she got a few more years of pretending in.

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