twinsies

22Feb09
sometimes i wish i had an identical twin
not just to mess with people
but we would mess with people
and if i told a joke that didn’t land
like “if i ever write a horror-porn
i will call it
i know what you did last hummer
and nobody laughed
i’d later claim
“i didn’t tell that joke,
it was my twin brother Ozymandias.”
and if we got into a fight and 
we both wished we had no brother
and he was all
“not my fault the egg divided”
i’d reply “the what whatted?”
cause, really, i didn’t pay attention in biology class
because the tall blonde wore a black bra
under her white NKOTB t-shirt with super stretched neck hole
and he’d laugh at me
jerk
sometimes i’m glad i don’t have an identical twin
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7 Responses to “twinsies”

  1. I have actually had the same conversation with myself, in so many words.

  2. Thank you for starting off my morning with “I Know What You Did Last Hummer.” It’s setting an excellent tone for the day.

    ps- The tone I’m referring to is laughter, not hummers

  3. You are whacked out of your head in the most delightfully charming way.

  4. Ozymandias! shit I hate that poem :(

  5. “Twinsies” is one of my new favorite words as of late. Like when I found an identical post of another very happy girl who got a Snuggie recently. I’m a dork like that.

  6. Ah, the NKOTB shirts. Always a distraction aren’t they?


  1. 1 smell you later, ‘09 « PeterDeWolf.com

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